Frank Ramos

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Less is More

When we write, we reduce paragraphs to sentences, sentences to phrases and phrases to words.  We excise excessive words, passive voice and throat-clearing phrases.  When we create trial themes, the fewer the words the better.  We search for  catch phrases that encapsulates them.  When we market our firms, we search for  taglines that capture our missions and values.  Our practice drives us to say more with less, to express ourselves succinctly and to cut through the noise and get to the essence of the matter.  So, if we’re wired this way, why do so many of us struggle with discarding our stuff?  Why do we need so many things and insist on keeping them?  Whether its toys for our kids, clothes for us, or stuff for our homes, we can gravitate toward holding onto too many things for too long, even at times, dare I say, hoarding.  So, do you own your stuff, or does it own you? Why do we have so much stuff and why do we keep it? 

  Setting aside heirlooms, family photos, mementos – we keep too much.  Check your garages, attics, storage units, closets, drawers, filing cabinets – what is all that?  Getting rid of stuff is cathartic.  You exert your control over items and you realize you don’t need them and once their gone, they’re forgotten.  The more we buy, the more we want.  The more we give away, the less we need.  Joseph Heller was asked at a party at a billionaire’s home how he felt that the host made more in a day than his book Catch 22 would ever make.  Heller said he had something that the host would never have – enough.  By regularly purging our homes and offices of stuff, we learn to have enough.  As they say, you can’t take it with you, and you’ll never see a U-Haul following a hearse.

Our family practices a few simple rules at home that allow us to live simply, without excess.

  • If we haven't used it in a year, we get rid of it.  Clothes we haven’t worn, gifts we no longer use and books we’ve read – we pack them up and give them to Goodwill or to our church.  The exception to the "one-year" rule are family mementos -  family photos, cards and letters we have exchanged and our  boys’ art.

  • Once we read books, we give them to someone else who would enjoy them.  We’re avid readers.  If we kept our books, we’d need another house to store them. 

  • If we have two, we give one away.  From impulse buys to Christmas and birthday gifts, we have had our share of plates, glasses, kitchen appliances and ties.  Way too many ties.  We pick out what we need and donate the rest. 

  • If it promotes bad habits, we get rid of it.  Video games were donated long ago.  Our living room television died and we never replaced it.  Electronics that distract get discarded.  We’re not anti-technology, but sometimes items that should make our lives easier take our lives over.

  • Do we need this?  If an item didn't meet our physical, emotional or spiritual needs, it didn’t stay in the house. 

  • When buying something, we ask ourselves, will we still be using this 6 months from now? If not, we generally don’t buy it.  We’ve saved so much money by not buying stuff that will ultimately end up in someone else’s home.

 

And how about the office?

  • I treat my office like I treat my cases.  What themes do I want to convey?  I have two.  I’m in control and I love my family.  If I’m not actively working on something, it doesn’t stay on my desk.  It gets filed away or thrown away.  My walls are covered by work-related plaques, art by my boys and family photos.  My shelves are filled with awards or mementos from the boys.  I have few books, no files, and no clutter.  You come into my office and you feel like I know what I’m doing, I’m in charge and I’m proud of my family.  I’m someone you want handling your matters.

  • I make a point to look at my mail as it comes in and get rid of it.  If I get a magazine that has an article I want to read, I have my legal assistant scan and send me the article and she tosses the magazine.  I refuse to keep anything in my office that isn’t adding value.  How many of us have kept months worth of magazines, feeling guilty we haven’t read them? Pull the articles you’re going to read and dump the rest. 

  • I hardly have anything in my drawers.  Stationary to write personal handwritten notes, a box of business cards, a few office supplies and a container of oatmeal for breakfast in the mornings.  I don’t need anything else.  We hoard so much stuff in our drawers.  Throw that stuff away, give it away or return it to the file or supply rooms. 

 

We convince ourselves we need so much, when we need so little.  Downsizing unburdens the soul and sets an example for our kids.  By showing them they can get by with less, they spend less time and energy working toward things they don’t need and spend more time and energy focused on what really matters.  Each of us has a finite time on this world.  Why spend a minute of it pursuing stuff that in the long term, adds little if any value?  Why not spend that time with family and friends, laughing and sharing, helping and volunteering?  Those of us who have the hardest time discarding the unnecessary, need the most help defining for ourselves what is necessary for our well being and what isn’t.  Figuring that out for ourselves is the first step in letting go of stuff and holding on to what’s important – family, friends, our firms, our houses of worship and our communities.